Stop Being So Damn Awkward!

I kinda assumed that one day I would just stop being socially awkward… and it never happened... or at least not without some dedicated thought and action...

Social awkwardness isn’t just a “teen phase” or an introvert’s badge of honor—it’s a confidence crusher that follows many of us into adulthood. Whether it's sweaty palms before small talk, or your mind going totally blank mid-conversation, the struggle is very real.

But good news: awkwardness is a habit—and like any habit, it can be rewired.

Here are 5 confidence-building tips straight from our ebook, Stop Being So Damn Awkward, plus some bonus body language tricks and easy conversation hacks to help you feel less like a human question mark and more like your real, capable self.

Tip 1: Set a Low Bar for Social Wins

One of the fastest ways to stop feeling overwhelmed in social situations? Shrink the goal.

You don’t have to become the life of the party or impress every person in the room. Just focus on one tiny win. That could mean:

• Making eye contact and smiling at someone

• Saying “hi” to a stranger in the elevator

• Asking one question in a group convo
  

Small reps build big results. Social confidence isn’t built in leaps—it’s built in inches.

Tip 2: Ask Easy, Open Questions

Instead of overthinking what to say, lead with curiosity. People love talking about themselves—it makes them feel heard and valued.

Here are three go-to questions that work almost anywhere:

• “How do you spend most of your time?”

• “What’s your favorite thing to do on weekends?”

• “What’s keeping you busy these days?”
  

These work because they’re open-ended and stress-free. They also give people a chance to share more than just surface-level facts.

Tip 3: Master the “Open Stance” Trick

Your body speaks before your mouth ever does. If your posture screams “don’t talk to me”, people won’t.

Here’s a quick fix:

• Keep your arms uncrossed

• Point your feet toward the person you’re engaging with

• Maintain a neutral or slightly warm expression
  

This signals you're approachable—even if you feel nervous on the inside.

Bonus hack: Standing with your feet shoulder-width apart and shoulders relaxed can instantly make you feel more grounded and confident.

Tip 4: Stop Apologizing for Existing

If your go-to move in conversations is to downplay yourself ("I’m probably boring you," "Sorry, I’m awkward"), it’s time to break that pattern.

These verbal habits don’t make you seem humble—they make you seem unsure. Instead, try owning your space. Speak clearly, and if you’re nervous, just acknowledge it with humor (“Socializing is a full-contact sport for me, but I’m getting better at it.”)

Confidence isn’t about being perfect. It’s about showing up as you are, minus the disclaimers.

Tip 5: Practice Awkward on Purpose

Yep. Awkward on purpose.

Try putting yourself in slightly uncomfortable social situations on your own terms. Think of it like exposure therapy for your social brain.

Some ideas:

• Ask a barista how their day is going

• Compliment someone’s outfit

• Join a small group class or online event and ask a question

The more you expose yourself to “mild” awkwardness, the less scary it becomes—and the more confident you’ll feel next time real life throws you into it.

Bonus: Quick Body Language & Social Hacks to Look More Confident.

Even if your brain is freaking out, these micro-adjustments can help you look calm and in control:

1. Use the “Pause, Don’t Panic” Rule
If you forget what to say, take a short pause and smile. Pauses look thoughtful, not awkward, when you own them.

2. Nod while listening
Nodding shows you're engaged and encourages the speaker to keep going—without you needing to say anything.

3. Mirror the other person subtly
Matching posture or gestures in a subtle way builds subconscious connection.

4. Hold something in your hands
A drink, a notebook, anything. It gives your hands a job and reduces fidgeting.

Final Thought

You don’t need a personality transplant to stop being socially awkward. You just need a few tools, a little practice, and permission to be imperfect.

Want all 65+ tips in one place? Grab the full Stop Being So Damn Awkward guide here.

It’s not about becoming someone else. It’s about becoming more you—but with better posture and fewer apologies.